Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
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