I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize
