i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
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