is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
