I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
My ass is underappreciated
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Randomize
