I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
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