i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
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