morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
I'm having to shit out rocks
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