it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Randomize
