I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
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