It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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