Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
Randomize
