I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
I still have a little drunk in my system
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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