Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
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