i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
