Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
