He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
