we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Randomize
