So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
nutella sex= disaster
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
That's how pantless uber rides happen
Randomize
