Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize