I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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