She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
