Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Randomize
