It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Randomize
