i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Randomize
