If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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