Just made out with a pet sitter. His biz card says "even hamsters". Lowest point in my life.
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
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