Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize