she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
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