You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
