how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
pray to the hookup gods
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
