What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Randomize