I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
