therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Dude my date hates me, Im on a rooftop full of Turkish people, and Ricky Martin is blasting on the radio. I was wrong earlier when I said I have my shit together
I love having hate sex.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
