Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Randomize
