Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
Randomize
