Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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