im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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