Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
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