Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
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