you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
my sisters under your porch take her home
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
he fucked my hip out of place.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
