Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Randomize
