it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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