I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
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