But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
