So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
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