check it out our google latitudes are spooning
During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Randomize
