I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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