I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
