She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
so much tequila, so little girl.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
