I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
he was CRYING into my vagina
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
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